How To Stop The Cyber Bully: On Twitter, Facebook, & Cellphone

Isolation, fear, and depression can drive kids, teens, and even adults to a serious low, which can cause them to commit suicide. As I’m sure most of us are aware being a victim or target of cyberbullying can also cause that tragic downward spiral. From fake Facebook pages and bad words to hate pages and death threats, cyberbullying continues to be a 24-7 battlefield for targets and victims.

Although a recent article would like to tell us differently, and basically states that cyberbullying isn’t as bad as traditional or school bullying, a recent survey on Twitter proves both are equally as dangerous. About 15,000 bully-related tweets are posted every day. This means that 100,000 nasty messages taint the digital world each week.  Read More

One users twitter account was recently shut down by police for such abuse.

These days with the use of cell phones, not only are nasty messages appearing more frequently, but also damaging photos. Kids and teens don’t always think of the consequences before sending a photo of themselves to others. Even though they may only intend for one person to see their photo, with digital imaging today and one click of a send button, the whole universe can view something that may have been intended to be very personal and private. The posting of nude or sexy images is referred to as sexting. This is cyberbullying at its worst! Article On Cell Phone Sexting

A recent survey interviewed both victims and bullies of cyberbullying and found some alarming facts from each.  Read Article

Not surprising that another report from Ontario, Canada found that girls are more likely to be bullied than boys. The survey found that 29% of girls reported being victims of cyberbullying, compared with just 15% of boys. They also discovered that 31% of girls were more likely to report being victims at school, than 26% boys. Read Article

Older men often prey on young girls and innocent victims. Recently, a 49 year-old man, who worked for the 2012 Olympics was arrested after investigators found he had 200 Twitter accounts all linked to pedophiles. Online predators and internet pornography is huge today.Read More

With new cyber bullying laws being passed, schools are finally beginning to see that they need to do more. One school in Tucson, Arizona is educating students on appropriate online behavior. The new effort is required under the federal “Protecting Children in the 21^st Century Act”—school districts must update their policies to include instructions for students. Schools must also have anti-bullying training and workshops. Read Article

Abuse Bites offers educational healing workshops on every form of abuse and bullying, that bring about the CHANGE that is so desperately need in schools, workplaces, and entire communities. Read More

Edgewave, a company out of California, believes it has the solution to help schools monitor student’s online activity. The program Iprism Social Media Security allows schools to seamlessly monitor and control user interactions with social networking applications such as Facebook and Twitter. It also gives educators visibility into student interactions with these sites. Read Article

Parents can get on board too and protect their kids with other new innovative programs. uKnowKids has just released their back to school cyberbullying infographic which includes the rising statistics of cyberbullying from the 2011-2012 school year. Their surveys found that 97% of middle schoolers have been bullied online, but only 10% reported it to a parent.

If you have a child(ren) who is(are) being bullied/cyberbullied or you’re concerned that they could be a target or a bully, here are some inside tips from uKnowKids:

• Set a Good Example:Kids learn from you and will mirror what you do.
• Talk Before It Happens:Have a chat with them about cyberbullying and what to do.
• When You See It, Address It:Whatever bullying there is, intervene and address it
• Talk About Your Rules:Let them know what happens if they cyberbully/ or bully others.
• Use a Parental Intelligence System:So you can view all their online activity.

Written by:Lisa Freeman, Lifelong Abuse Survivor & Advocate, Founder & CEO of AbuseBites.com, Healing Projects Specialist with Bully Police USA

Other Informative Articles:

Software Detects & Deters Cyberbullying

Why You Should Care: Internet Bullying (E16)    *Video* need help with speakers

School bullies take to the web in Loris

AT&T, Verizon and WebSafety Inc. Offer Cyber Protection

Cyber Security: Bullies On The Web

Has Bullying Stopped or Gone Viral?

HAS BULLYING STOPPED or HAS IT TAKEN A WHOLE OTHER DIRECTION? 

Take a good look around the good old USA. Your neighborhood. What do you think... has bullying decreased, increased, or stayed the same?

A recent study at a high school in Massachussettes indicates they are getting fewer reports on student bullying according to statistics from surveys in 2011. What do you think? Is bullying getting better at your local schools? Maybe this school has some tips we can all learn from! Get the full story here.

With school being out for the summer, parents aren't contacting us here at Abuse Bites so much.

Yet, I've read story after story about kids being singled out, beaten and horribly victimized. One 10 year old boy was even burned with a lighter on a bus! Video Here

When interviewed about bullying teens said things like, you don't want to be the little kid who sits by himself at the lunch table. But bullying is far worse than just the lunch room these days. Cyber bullying stalks kids 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Five kids from the Boys and Girls Club of Kansas City said they had been mean online, but had never been bullied themselves. More

Jack Joblonski was paralyzed during a hockey game in December, when his spine was severed and he was told he'd never walk again. Recently he was bullied on twitter. Read how he overcame his bullies and even his disability.

Cyber Bullying has a viral spread that we must constantly keep up to date on. It used to be simply bad/negative words in text, now it is hate pages on facebook (two middle school girls were even arrested) and sexting, sending sexual images via cell phone/computer. Kids and teens don't realize how someone can take that image and use it against them. More

Sadly, kids are still taking their lives or being bullied to death. Joel Morales of New York, only 12, committed suicide in May, after bullies tormented him about his father's death.

It's tough as parents to sit by and watch our kids be hurt and wither away to nothing. But we can't very well, fight back like this father, and hire someone to beat our kids bully. More About This Story

So what are parents to do?

Parents can get help, thankfully. They can partner with us here, at Abuse Bites, to bring programs like ours which educates on current bullying themes and safety measures to take as well as provides the healing that victims, bystanders, and bullies need. We're offering FREE WORKSHOPS right now in a contest. Check it out! More about us and what we offer.

There is also a new software on the market that will allow you to keep track of and protect your kids and family while on line and via cell. Check out this link for more helpful info.

by Lisa Freeman, CEO Abuse Bites

Bullying Happens In Summer Too!

BULLYING HAPPENS IN SUMMER TOO!

You might take a vacation in the summer, but bullying doesn't!

As a child, teen and even adult I was abused and bullied more than I ever shared.

My mom wasn’t one of those mothers you could talk to. She rarely cried and didn’t want any of us kids moping or having problems. When I had night terrors as a child, she took me to the doctor and they prescribed me sleeping pills. Still I woke up many times at night in a sweat, gasping for air. I thought I was dying. But it was just panic attacks and post traumatic stress syndrome from all the abuse I suffered.

Back then we had lots of sexual predators in the neighborhood. But today, sexual predators and bullies can get to your children 24 hours a day 7 days a week via the internet and or their cell phones.

Dr. Jennifer Caudle of the University of Medicine and Dentistry of New Jersey-School of Osteopathic Medicine states says, “Bullying can happen wherever kids gather – in school, at summer camp or in cyberspace. Bullying isn’t just limited to the classroom. Talking with your kids about bullying is just as important in the summer as it is during the school year – especially when it is time to head to summer camp.” 

To learn more about how to talk to your kids about bullying Read Dr. Jennifer Caudle news story here. 

Check out Lisa's Other New Blog Site!

7 Ways To Stop Abuse & Bullying!

We get letters, phone calls, emails, face book messages from desperate children, teens, parents, and workers every day! People are being bullied and they want it to stop! Believe me, we want it to stop too!

My son, Brian, had Asperger's Syndrome and a rare heart disease and was bullied all through life. But more than anything he wanted to go all the USA to educate others, raise awareness, share his story & and offering healing to all, even though he'd been on the heart transplant list for 5 years.

Brian knew what it was like to hurt, but he also knew what it was like to heal. He loved everyone (even the bullies!) and had a passion to give that gift of love and forgiveness to others.

Sadly, last year as we were planning our trip around the USA, he passed away from a blood clot.  He always said, "Mom, you can't go without me!"

On Brian's 23rd birthday we launched 23 balloons with the message "How Far Will You Go To Stop Abuse?" in his memory, to see how far they'd go. Some of them were reported being found 90 miles away! That was cool! But that wasn't enough...

This summer we raised our own funding and went on a Walk n Talk Across Michigan, over 1,000 miles (of driving--then we walked around each major city--15 total) talking to people, offering FREE HEALING WORKSHOPS in schools, churches, work places and communities. But that still wasn't enough...

We know we are called to complete the mission in Brian's memory, to go all over the USA and even the WORLD to STOP ABUSE and with your help we can do just that! IF we can get this healing message to the entire world, then that will be enough!

How                       Far                     Will                   You                      Go  

To    Stop  Abuse? 

The great news is, you can stay right where you are and still stop abuse.

There are 7 ways to Stop Abuse & Bullying right from where you are:

1#  By not standing by when others are abused--do something, say something, go get help! REPORT ALL BULLYING!

 2# By not allowing others to physically, verbally, emotionally or spiritually abuse you! Stand up for yourself!

 3# By treating others the way you yourself would like to be treated! Do unto others

4# By telling all your friends, family, coworkers, church family, schools, community about our program Abuse Bites

5# By volunteering in our program, right from your desktop, computer, office, home, etc

6# By praying for us diligently as we take on this huge mission God has called us to (for funding, open doors in schools/communities, health, safety, and God's divine will and direction)

7# By donating or sponsoring us so we can have the funding (for gas and food) to travel abroad to share these healing workshops FREE to all :)   See ChangeForBrian.com

Donate Online @ Abuse Bites.com

Sponsorship Opportunities Online @ Sponsor US


Via Mail: Abuse Bites, Change for Brian, PO Box 1582, Owosso, MI  48867 (Make Checks Payable to Abuse Bites)

*All donations/sponsorships are 100% tax deductible and will be used to Stop Abuse & Bullying!

Thank you and may God bless you richly for your generous prayers, help, and gifts! 

Forgiving My Bullies

It's been less than 2 months since I buried my son. (Brian's story)

The grief from that has been enough to weigh on my heart, let alone being bullied through it. I wasn't out to hurt no one. I attacked no one. I simply logged onto my facebook account and posted my feelings on my wall. I have to admit, it was one of the roughest days I'd had since Brian passed. I haven't had much sleep due to my other son having a life threatening seizure. (Jeremiah's story)

I felt deserted. Hurt. Lonely. So I posted something about feeling hurt, that no one would probably understand, or if they did they'd be too busy with their own lives to respond.

A certain person, from the church I recently attended for more than two years, responded. More like, she viciously attacked me. She replied with a comment to say that I shouldn't be feeling like that or wallowing in my own grief and sorrow. Instead I should be like her, going to church 4 times a week, so I can fit in and receive love. After all she'd lost both parents and a sibling and knew what grief was like.

Why do we always try to fit everyone into our little box and stereotype their life? 

That would be like me stereotyping how the church should act with me and my family. While they gave freely and liberally to another family in need, they seemed to forget our needs altogether. Other than the typical service our church gives to everyone, bringing 3 meals in right after the funeral; No one called, came over, or hardly posted anything encouraging on our facebook wall. Yet, we realized that this other family needed them, so we stepped back.

I have learned through these two hard years, you can be left out in a whole room full of people, even at church. 

Sadly, me and my family know how that feels first hand. At church softball games we sat there watching as certain people passed right by us to offer everyone else hugs. We watched cliques form inside the church and even tried to speak to leadership about it, but was told there wasn't any and I was being deceived, and then the very next Sunday it became a sermon, and suddenly Jesus even had cliques! Many times I'd offered to serve in different areas in this particular church, but was told I did enough already, so I prayed and took my talents and gifts to reach others outside the four walls of the church.

As the Lord led, I taught pet therapy, held anti-abuse/bullying workshops, visited and prayed for the sick, helped the poor and needy, and did various parades to raise awareness on abuse and bullying.

We did reach people. We even brought many of these individuals into that same church. Sadly some of them were bullied and left out too. Some have moved on and found churches were they are loved and accepted, some are still there praying it will change.

Every time someone walked out the door, I heard, "Let 'em go. I don't even care why they left."

But in the Bible, Jesus clearly states that he is the Good Shepherd and if even one strayed off he would leave the 99 others and go after that one.

We are supposed to be the church, the body. It should affect us when someone walks away hurt or wounded. We should love them and pursue them in or outside the church walls. 

I'm not condemning the church; I'm speaking to the body. Why are we attacking our own? I've been shown more love and compassion from people in the world that don't claim to have a personal relationship with Jesus or any affiliation with God. Why is that?

 

God designed the church to be a place for healing, love, acceptance, freedom and life, not a place of judgment, condemnation, or to be left out. We were all created equal, born with a free will. God is the only one who can ever change us or judge us. 

So why do we keep trying to fit everyone into our own little box, and when they don't fit, we toss them out like rotten potatoes? 

I can't speak for anyone else, but for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.  And I will do what my son Brian would do, forgive my bullies, in and out of the church, in life and in death. Because if I keep holding this hurt inside, I know I'm only hurting myself. If I don't forgive, I will not be forgiven.

Forgiveness is key to healing any heart, sorrow, pain or grief. I hope you too can forgive those that have hurt you. And if I've hurt you, please forgive me.