Don't Bury Your Child's Dreams

Even though my son, Brian, had a rare heart condition and Asperger's Syndrome. I never dreamed the day would come when he would die. He was so healthy at the end, although on the heart transplant list for five years, I was certain he'd outlive me and his father.

Losing a child is sad. But losing a child who has suffered so much physically and mentally due to being bullied is another terrible tragedy. He lived and died forgiving his bullies. He was working in our program "Abuse Bites" right up to the end to educate others to stop bullying, abuse, and violence. His lifelong dream and goal had been to travel around the USA with us in an RV to take this important message to others.

It's only been a month since he passed away.

As I sat on the couch missing him and reading his obituary last night, I reread this touching poem on the inside: A Time will come when my life will cease, But when that time comes, I ask that you will remember these things:

*Bury my body, but don't bury my beliefs.

*Bury my heart but don't bury my love. 

*Bury my eyes, but not my vision. 

*Bury my feet, but not the path of my life. 

*Bury my hands but don't bury my diligent efforts. 

*Bury my shoulders but not the concern I carried. 

*Bury my voice, but not my message. 

*Bury my mind, but don't bury my dreams. 

*Bury me, but don't bury my life. 

*If you must bury something, let it be my faults and my weaknesses, But let my life continue in you!

In my son, Brian's honor, his beliefs, love, vision, path, efforts, concern he carried for others, his message and life, will continue on through us to go out on that mission he always wanted to. Please help us in our efforts (see CHANGE for BRIAN) to go on this mission. We will have to quit our jobs, we will need to raise enough money for an RV, and to feed us and our dogs and supply the gas to travel. 

Another Form of Bullying

Acceptance. Big word. Big problem in the school. Big problem in the church. And a big problem in the world.

We give off signals like a flashing yellow light. By the way we speak, or don't speak, share, or don't share, include or exclude we choose to reject or accept people every day.  Sometimes aware, sometimes unaware. Either way, rejected, wounded, hurting people are all around us.

When was the last time you went out of your way to include someone who was different, new, or had a disability? When was the last time you hugged someone that seemed dirty, strange, or unlovable in your eyes? When was the last time you reached out to be a friend to someone who was all alone and didn't have any/many friends?

In our culture we're all afraid of the R word—REJECTION. Everyone wants to be loved and accepted. Yet, many times, we are unconsciously pushing them away for whatever reason. Maybe we're afraid of being rejected by them if we reach out?

Although I try to make it a point to reach out to those who are different, I get nervous and sweaty, because I've been one of those who have been rejected all my life.

You? You might ask. A gifted writer, speaker, and pet therapist! Yes, me! Why not me? Why not you?

Rejection happens to many people in all walks of life all over the world every day. And it needs to stop. But the only way it will, is when we decide to accept others, and stop putting up walls or stereotyping.

The truth is ANYONE can take on bullying behaviors. I am taking on bullying behaviors when I choose to ignore or not accept another person who is different from me or I think I won't like. We are all different. We are all unique. We are all special. We are all important. Together we are a body that makes the world complete.

I might only be an ugly toe to someone, but I still can give balance to another who may not have it. I may only be a big mouth, but may say a word another needs to hear to get healed. I may only be a finger, but may be able to point others in the right direction. I may only be a nose, but I may smell fire so I can warn others before they burn. I may only be an eye, but I may see something in your path that could harm you. I may only be an ear, but I may hear something wonderful to share with you. I may only be a voice, but I may tell you how much your loved and valued when others want to persecute and destroy you. I may be a heart, but may love and care for you like no other. I may only be a back, but I may be the only who stands behind you. I may only be a foot, but I may pave the way to make it easier for you. I may only be an arm, but I may be the only one reaching out to hold you.

The body, each intricate part, is so important to its function. And that's how we are as individuals. My kids, every one of them have disabilities, yet they have even greater abilities, and our family/body could not function well without them.

Our family is feeling that loss right now. One of my children, Brian, recently passed away. He had a rare heart condition and Asperger's Syndrome. By the world's standards he was disabled, a reject, an outcast, but he was one of the most important parts of this family and this body. He served, he gave, and he loved more than anyone I know. When people bullied him, he forgave them. When people ignored him, he loved them. When the world threw him lemons, he made lemonade. He was determined to use the ability God gave to help others, no matter what the cost.

That's why our family is doing a CHANGE of HEART for Brian in his honor. We are going all over the USA to educate others about accepting and loving one another, to stop abuse, bullying and violence. So, why not be the change for Brian and help us to make a difference to those who have been bullied and those taking on bullying behaviors to set them free. http://www.takeabiteoutofabuse.com/change.html