Do you live in fear every day? Did you stop going certain places for fear you'd be bullied? Have you become a prisoner in your own home?
An estimated 160,000 children stay home from school every day for fear of being bullied. 30 % of all parents fear that their child will be hurt at school. And four out of ten kids are bullied or know someone who is.
My son, Jeremiah, was one of those kids. He was bullied in the 5th grade all the way until his junior year. His self-esteem dropped to an all time low. He feared going to school. He feared being around other kids. And he feared leaving the house.
Jeremiah would always make excuses for not wanting to go places. I thought he was just getting older and didn't want to hang out with us. But he had developed a severe panic disorder from the bullying he suffered. For a time he totally isolated himself for fear no one would accept him.
Thankfully we got him help and he now helps in our program "Take A Bite Out Of Abuse" by sharing his story and songs that he wrote to help others.
Signs Your Child Is Living In Fear Of Being Bullied:
-Say their sick and can't go to school
-Say they don't want to go places they used to enjoy going
-Say they don't want to join groups (basketball, karate, etc)
-Stay home all the time and don't want to go anywhere
-Stop hanging out with friends or make excuses not to
Some Ways You Can Help Them Conquer Their Fears
-Talk with them about the situation
-Get them into a counselor/therapist
-See your regular doctor in case they might need some medication
-Don't allow them to isolate themselves
-Require them to come along to all events and family outings, letting them know that if they feel panic coming on, you'll be there for them, and if they need to get some air, that's okay
-Require them to join a group of their choosing, but be ready to talk, listen, and intervene if bullying should start there too
*For more information or to see what we are doing to fight back, log onto our website @ http://www.abusebites.com
"All who rage against you will surely be ashamed and disgraced; those who oppose you will be as nothing and perish. Though you search for your enemies you will not find them. Those who wage war against you will be nothing at all. For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. Do not be afraid." Isaiah 41:11-14a
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Author & Dog In Active Duty To Fight Bullying
Lisa Freeman, an award-winning author of Owosso, and her therapy dog, Snickers, have been honored with the position as Healing Projects Specialist with the Bully Police USA (www.bullypolice.org). Bully Police USA is a Watch-dog Organization-advocating for bullied children and reporting on state anti bullying laws.
"When I contacted Brenda High about becoming a member, I was blown away," Freeman said. "She said, 'I love your program and I've never heard of anything like what you offer. You're stories of healing are so amazing. And everyone loves dogs.' That's when she said was adding us to her speaker's bureau and also asked me to be their Healing Projects Specialist."
Freeman first learned about Brenda High after doing some research on bullying. Ms. High founded the non-profit organization in honor of her son, Jared, who was a victim of bullying and who later took his own life @ 13 as a result of bullying (bullycide). More about Jared can be found @ http://www.jaredstory.com/.
Jared's mother works feverishly to get anti bullying laws passed in the United States so that kids and parents won't have to suffer the way she and her son have. Although there isn't an anti bullying law in Michigan at this moment, "Matt's Law" is currently in the works, in honor of Matt Epling, who was also a victim of bullycide in 2002. More about Matt can be found @ http://mattepling.webs.com/antibullying.htm.
As an active member of the Bully Police USA, Freeman, her dogs, and family hope to tackle the war on bullying here in Michigan, through their innovative program Take A Bite Out Of Abuse. They will not only educate, bring awareness, and safety techniques to children, parents, and educators, but they will also help those who have been abused/bullied to find hope and healing in their own lives.
Recently Take A Bite Out Of Abuse was asked by RAVE to present their program to staff members in Clinton County. "After we finished," Freeman says, "we were told that it was the best anti bullying program they've ever seen, and would refer us to all schools in the area in the upcoming year. "
For more information about bullying, abuse, or Take A Bite Out OF Abuse and the workshops offered, please feel free to contact Lisa Freeman via web @ www.abusebites.com or www.runtolife.org, via email @ abusebites@gmail.com, or via phone @ 989-729-2124.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Are You Running To Abuse & Bullying?
It's funny. Or maybe it's not. But all my life I wanted more than anything to be loved, accepted and feel important. Still somehow I always seemed to run in the wrong direction.
Inside I always wanted to do the right thing. But I was sucked in to going along with the crowd so I'd have friends and fit in somewhere.
I was afraid of doing drugs, but everyone in my neighborhood smoked pot. They already thought I did it, so I was cool. Until one day when we were hanging out and they lit up a joint. I was scared to death. When they passed the joint my way I wanted to say no and run home. But I didn't want to look like some dork or be the odd girl out. Yet, my heart pounded like it would explode right out my chest. I just knew if I took a hit I'd die. Still I went along with the crowd.
Another time my supposed BF (best friend--and I use the term FRIEND loosely) and I were shopping. She talked me into stealing. It was scary at first. But I grabbed the pair of earrings and hurried out of the store. Wow! I got away with it! And I got some really nice jewelry for nothing! The next day we did it again. After only a couple weeks I had all this amazing jewelry and I was even ripping off clothes. Everything seemed to be going pretty good. Until one day I was with this same girl in JC Penney's. I had ripped a purse for myself and started walking home, but then she wanted me to go back to the store and get her one too. I didn't have a good feeling about it at all. My gut screamed, "NO!" But she kept pleading and begging, so I went back in, and you guessed it, I got busted. And where was my so called BF while I got a good talking to and threatened that if I ever came back in the store, they'd call my parents, of course she ditched me and took off.
Guys would ditch me too. Oh they'd say they'd love me and that they'd be there for me, but they weren't. As soon as they got what they wanted they'd be gone. Or if they were still around, they were only there to hurt and abuse me.
I'd like to say I got smart and hung out with better people. I didn't. For years I ran to a lifestyle of abuse and let others bully me. It wasn't until much later, as a grown woman, that I learned life is all about choices and I could literally choose friends/relationships that were good and would benefit me, or I could continue to make the poor choices I'd been making.
Basically I was a 7th grade middle school drop out, who suffered through 2 painfully abusive marriages, and became a nothing, but at 26, now a single mother of three I went back to school, got my GED, went onto college where I maintained a 4.0 and made the Dean's List, got a degree in Christian Ministry, and became an Award-Winning Christian Author, Teacher, Speaker, Pet Therapist, and Abuse Advocate. Today I'm running to life and I'm more happy than I've ever been.
It's our choice. We can keep running to bad relationships and a life of abuse or bullying that will bring us down, or we can stop the cycle of abuse and make the choice to run in the right direction--to life and be set free.
I hope you won't have to suffer the way I have. That's why I'm fighting back, by sharing my story through speaking at churches, anti-bullying workshops in schools, and writing books and blogging. By getting this information out there, others can break free too.
Inside I always wanted to do the right thing. But I was sucked in to going along with the crowd so I'd have friends and fit in somewhere.
I was afraid of doing drugs, but everyone in my neighborhood smoked pot. They already thought I did it, so I was cool. Until one day when we were hanging out and they lit up a joint. I was scared to death. When they passed the joint my way I wanted to say no and run home. But I didn't want to look like some dork or be the odd girl out. Yet, my heart pounded like it would explode right out my chest. I just knew if I took a hit I'd die. Still I went along with the crowd.
Another time my supposed BF (best friend--and I use the term FRIEND loosely) and I were shopping. She talked me into stealing. It was scary at first. But I grabbed the pair of earrings and hurried out of the store. Wow! I got away with it! And I got some really nice jewelry for nothing! The next day we did it again. After only a couple weeks I had all this amazing jewelry and I was even ripping off clothes. Everything seemed to be going pretty good. Until one day I was with this same girl in JC Penney's. I had ripped a purse for myself and started walking home, but then she wanted me to go back to the store and get her one too. I didn't have a good feeling about it at all. My gut screamed, "NO!" But she kept pleading and begging, so I went back in, and you guessed it, I got busted. And where was my so called BF while I got a good talking to and threatened that if I ever came back in the store, they'd call my parents, of course she ditched me and took off.
Guys would ditch me too. Oh they'd say they'd love me and that they'd be there for me, but they weren't. As soon as they got what they wanted they'd be gone. Or if they were still around, they were only there to hurt and abuse me.
I'd like to say I got smart and hung out with better people. I didn't. For years I ran to a lifestyle of abuse and let others bully me. It wasn't until much later, as a grown woman, that I learned life is all about choices and I could literally choose friends/relationships that were good and would benefit me, or I could continue to make the poor choices I'd been making.
Basically I was a 7th grade middle school drop out, who suffered through 2 painfully abusive marriages, and became a nothing, but at 26, now a single mother of three I went back to school, got my GED, went onto college where I maintained a 4.0 and made the Dean's List, got a degree in Christian Ministry, and became an Award-Winning Christian Author, Teacher, Speaker, Pet Therapist, and Abuse Advocate. Today I'm running to life and I'm more happy than I've ever been.
It's our choice. We can keep running to bad relationships and a life of abuse or bullying that will bring us down, or we can stop the cycle of abuse and make the choice to run in the right direction--to life and be set free.
I hope you won't have to suffer the way I have. That's why I'm fighting back, by sharing my story through speaking at churches, anti-bullying workshops in schools, and writing books and blogging. By getting this information out there, others can break free too.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Kick the Bully's Butt--Fight Back God's Way
Wow! Life has been absolutely crazy lately. For months, even a couple years now, I've been doing a lot of research on bullying and abuse. As I studied kids who'd been bullied, I came across Jared's story of bullycide--his mom Brenda founded The Bully Police USA. Her precious son was bullied to the point that he became depressed and took his own life. I can so relate. The same thing nearly happened to my son, Jeremiah, two years ago.
Jeremiah was just starting his sophomore year. He'd been bullied since he was in the 5th grade, but he'd always had his older brother and sister to rely on and hang out with. But they had both graduated the previous year, so it left him all alone and feeling defenseless when the bully attacked him that first day of school.
He reported the bullying right away and they thought they had handled the situation by talking to the bully. However the bullying never stopped. In fact it got to the point that my son's life was threatened, he began having panic attacks, and he started feeling so desperate and hated facing school so much that he took a belt and wrapped it around his neck three times.
Luckily Jeremiah stopped before it was too late and confided in us after some questioning just how bad it had gotten. So we got him the help and the protection he needed. But believe me, we had to fight for it!
Today we are teaming up with Brenda and other parents/educators to help kids/adults who've been bullied and to prevent others from being bullied. We are now the Healing Projects Specialist for the Bully Police USA and are fighting back against bullying and abuse with our new program "Take A Bite Out Of Abuse".
We teach students, parents, and educators how to fight/defeat the bully without violence:
Here's 10 things every child/parent should know...
1. Statistics show us that 1 out of 10 kids are bullies, but there are nine others who aren't bullies, so if those nine simply STICK TOGETHER, they can defeat the bully (there is power in numbers)
2. Most kids are bullied when alone--so always be paired up with a partner
3. Speak Up. Not only for yourself, but others too. Report all bullying the second it happens to a safe adult (if online/cyber bullying print it up and don't respond back and show it to the proper authorities)
4. Don't walk away when others are being bullied (if you're too afraid to stay there, at least get help for the one being bullied). If you aren't a part of the solution, you are a part of the problem. By walking away and doing nothing you are just as bad as the person bullying.
5. If a bully approaches you try to walk/run away and get help.
6. Try befriending bullies, do something nice for them (if you can), as most bullies have probably been bullied. Hurt people usually hurt people.
7. Bullying is never about ANGER, it's always about power and control.
8. If you don't seem to be getting help after reporting a bullying incident and it keeps happening, keep climbing the ladder and talking to the next person up in authority.
9. We must realize that most bullies are afraid too, afraid of being hurt again, so therefore they hurt others.
10. Over 100,000 kids are bullied each day and afraid to go to school.
Now you Can Help us:
To help us fight this war on bullying you can go to your school and request that they get an educational anti-bullying program in place that will teach not only safety and prevention, but healing techniques for those who've already been bullied and abused.
Our program is just one of many @ www.abusebites.com
Jeremiah was just starting his sophomore year. He'd been bullied since he was in the 5th grade, but he'd always had his older brother and sister to rely on and hang out with. But they had both graduated the previous year, so it left him all alone and feeling defenseless when the bully attacked him that first day of school.
He reported the bullying right away and they thought they had handled the situation by talking to the bully. However the bullying never stopped. In fact it got to the point that my son's life was threatened, he began having panic attacks, and he started feeling so desperate and hated facing school so much that he took a belt and wrapped it around his neck three times.
Luckily Jeremiah stopped before it was too late and confided in us after some questioning just how bad it had gotten. So we got him the help and the protection he needed. But believe me, we had to fight for it!
Today we are teaming up with Brenda and other parents/educators to help kids/adults who've been bullied and to prevent others from being bullied. We are now the Healing Projects Specialist for the Bully Police USA and are fighting back against bullying and abuse with our new program "Take A Bite Out Of Abuse".
We teach students, parents, and educators how to fight/defeat the bully without violence:
Here's 10 things every child/parent should know...
1. Statistics show us that 1 out of 10 kids are bullies, but there are nine others who aren't bullies, so if those nine simply STICK TOGETHER, they can defeat the bully (there is power in numbers)
2. Most kids are bullied when alone--so always be paired up with a partner
3. Speak Up. Not only for yourself, but others too. Report all bullying the second it happens to a safe adult (if online/cyber bullying print it up and don't respond back and show it to the proper authorities)
4. Don't walk away when others are being bullied (if you're too afraid to stay there, at least get help for the one being bullied). If you aren't a part of the solution, you are a part of the problem. By walking away and doing nothing you are just as bad as the person bullying.
5. If a bully approaches you try to walk/run away and get help.
6. Try befriending bullies, do something nice for them (if you can), as most bullies have probably been bullied. Hurt people usually hurt people.
7. Bullying is never about ANGER, it's always about power and control.
8. If you don't seem to be getting help after reporting a bullying incident and it keeps happening, keep climbing the ladder and talking to the next person up in authority.
9. We must realize that most bullies are afraid too, afraid of being hurt again, so therefore they hurt others.
10. Over 100,000 kids are bullied each day and afraid to go to school.
Now you Can Help us:
To help us fight this war on bullying you can go to your school and request that they get an educational anti-bullying program in place that will teach not only safety and prevention, but healing techniques for those who've already been bullied and abused.
Our program is just one of many @ www.abusebites.com
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